Healthy dom sub relationship

Most of what people think about BDSM, is wrong. And also the concept of "pain" we are talking about is not what people think. He must have pleasure in giving pleasure and not simply receiving what he wants. This book is intended for both Dominant and Submissive training. After reading this book you will have made your sex life richer and your partner will beg you for more.

First, let me frame this. You are choosing because you want this, and you want it enough to make it an everyday thing rather than an occasional one. You are at choice at every point; if you are building trust, there is no need for shackles. The partners know each other so well that they want the same things and move together seamlessly. You are not extending your wank fantasies into your everyday reality; you will not be aroused at all times. This is not a huge ongoing role-play scenario. It comes with a whole different — related, but different — psychology.

I accidentally crossed paths with my first Dominant online when I was going through a divorce seven years ago. My first thought was to run away fast: He must be some whip-toting freak with a dungeon in his basement. What appeals to me the most is the intense cerebral connection — the mind play and the feelings it conjures in me, sometimes all day long the brain is, after all, the biggest sex organ. The words, the orders, the reprimands, the tone and the downright audacity for him to say it all: Never would I allow anyone else to speak to me in this way, or, over all, to have such deep access into my mind, body and heart. And I hear myself responding in ways that similarly shock me — from mouthy and totally improper to meek and pleasing or with no air in my lungs at all.

Welcome to my website! If you want to find out more, check out my books and zines which cover this topic in more depth. If you like this, please do consider supporting my Patreon. Some people are into all of the things listed under BDSM, and some only some of them. Of course it is pretty common for sex and power to be mixed together in our culture.